Plants, and Other Conscious Beings

This is a lovely Christmas arrangement that we were gifted with over the holiday season.  I should have taken a picture of it earlier, because it also had a little cedar tree in it.  This arrangement was our Christmas tree this year, and we appreciated it to no end.  It brought color into the house and a feeling of festive celebration into our lives.

Today I noticed the cedar tree was just beginning to turn brown on the ends and so I pulled it out and loosened it's trapped pruned roots, and popped it into the ground outdoors near the house, so as not shock it too terribly.  I will move it again in early Spring if it survives the freezing temperatures.  I have a friend who has a farm nearby and it may go out there.  I've sort of run out of space on my small patch of ground.

And this is the thing about these beautiful holiday arrangements.  Living things are living things.  I know that sounds redundant, but we as humans tend to care less for life forms that don't appear to interact with us.  And yet everything does.  Whether we're aware of it or not.  I could tell you stories...

But apart from the obvious things, house plants interact with us in the most intimate way.  We exchange air.  You can live without many things in life.  You can even last for a time without food and water.  But air is precious.  They make ours, and we make theirs.

So many people receive trees in planters, and almost no one knows that those "Christmas type" trees were never meant to be kept in a planter and they were never meant to be indoors.  It is slow torture to a tree that has the dna to become a giant, to be in a small pot --indoors-- through the winter.

I planted my little cedar friend next to the lavender in my flower bed.  It has access to rain, in case I forget to water it, and it is in a spot that will allow it to go into dormancy, but still be somewhat sheltered from severe weather, while it is trying to return to its natural rhythm.  For these next few nights, I will cover it with a box to protect it from frost, and give it plenty of water.  I wouldn't have to do this, but the tree is going from one extreme to another.  I want the new environment to be like a tonic rather than damaging to the small tree.

This action started me wondering about the other plants in the arrangement.  The only one I recognized was the poinsettia.  Thanks to google, I identified the other two plants and realized that I had three plants with different needs all planted within the same environment.  The Kalanchoe blossfeldiana is a succulent and the "Frosty Fern" is a moss.  They look incredible together, but they would not be able to survive together.

I will leave the moss in it's original pot, because there is no drainage in it, which suits the Frosty fern perfectly.  And I will transplant the other two as soon as possible.  For now, at least I know not to water the succulent area of the pot too often and to keep the moss very wet.

And here is another Christmas gift.  I received a mushroom kit from a friend.  So it's been a very "living" Christmas this year.  I started them as soon as I brought them home, because I wasn't sure how long they had been sitting in my friend's warm house.  This is one week's growth.  I've tried to grow mushrooms before, with less than spectacular results, but this kit from SnoValley Mushrooms, has been amazing to see.  Their instructions were completely different than the instructions from my last mushroom kit, which may be why I'm now having success.  Now that I know I can actually successfully grow mushrooms, I think I'll continue this practice.  The other kit I tried some years ago, became a horrible, moldy, smelly mess.  This kit is beautiful!  I will probably harvest them Thursday or Friday as per instructions, then follow the directions to see if I will get another harvest, or two, or even three!

Update on the Peepers!

Christmas day was a very traumatic day for the Peepers.  I was talking to my sister and her family on the phone, when I heard "HELP!" from Ruby, my hen.  I dropped the phone and burst outside.  I saw Ruby and chicks running for their little house.  I tried to count chicks, and noticed something sitting on the ground, that I couldn't identify.  Not that is, until it lifted off!  It was a hawk and it had one of my chicks!

I ran at it screaming in a voice I've heard my rooster use when he sees a predator.  In that timeless moment, where nothing is decided for certain, one way or another, I reached out with my whole heart and desired nothing else, but to have my chick back.  It was a powerful emotion, and it overrode every other feeling in my mind and body.  In a second it was over.  The hawk dropped the chick, and it fluttered safely to the ground and ran back up the little terraced path to me.  I picked it up and snuggled it, and cooed to it, and checked it over gently for wounds. Then I took it back to the flock and I saw that Ruby had blood on her comb.  Perhaps from trying to defend her offspring.  They spent the rest of the day huddled in their little house.

Since then, The hawk has made two more tries, but the yard they inhabit, is too over grown to really get at them easily.  Not enough room for a hawk's wingspan to pick them off from the air.  At the least sound of alarm, I'm outside.

I know, it's silly.  They're not even cute anymore.  They look like little fat vultures.  But I love them.  They make me smile.  And while I really had hoped they would all be hens, the little rooster, is fast becoming my friend.  He loves to be held, and he has beautiful green eyes.  I wasn't expecting that. 

Well, that had better be all for now.  I'm needing to get back to work.  It's a beautiful sunny day with clear skies, which means it will be cold cold cold tonight, but it's dry and a good day to bind books.

Happy New Year!

Feast Day of Our Lady of Guadalupe

I am neither Catholic, nor of Mexican heritage, and yet Our Lady of Guadalupe has come into my life more than once.  Her legend is beautiful and profound, and so when a friend of mine suggested three of us meet on the feast day of Our Lady of Guadalupe to paint her image, I felt deeply honored to participate.

Especially, since I am not a painter.

Anyone who is familiar with the iconic image of Our Lady of Guadalupe, would maybe point out that she does not have white hair, but this is how she presented herself to me.  And why wouldn't she be all things to all people.

There wasn't enough time for me to finish it today, but through the process of painting The Lady, I am finding a love for painting.  I hope I am brave enough to continue.

The Golden Key

The Golden Key by George MacDonald
with illustrations by Charles van Sandwyk
available from Pegana Press 2015

This is the latest book I've been binding for Pegana Press.  The Golden Key by George MacDonald with illustrations by Charles van Sandwyk.  This book has kept me really busy since early November.  It's a big enough responsibility to bind books for collectors who have pre-ordered the book sight unseen, but it's been an even bigger responsibility since our release coincides with the season when people are thinking about Christmas gifts, and some of our customers have ordered the book to give as gifts.  I can not help but be aware of what a great honor that is--that someone would trust us to help make their loved one's Christmas special. 

But I'm breathing a little easier now that I've filled almost all the preorders.  All of the books designated as gifts, should be shipped out in time to arrive before Christmas.

It really is a special book.  Typeset all by hand and letterpress printed on multicolored pages in Rose, Custard, Green, and Blue.  With 3 pen and ink illustrations and a hand signed watercolor frontispiece by Charles van Sandwyk.  Also each book is hand bound with cloth covered boards and inset letterpress title on the front of the book.

It is a wonderful fairy story and we wanted the book to reflect the tradition of books dating back 100 years.

You can see more images of the book at Pegana Press Books.

Here's a quote from The Golden Key

    ... And her great blue eyes looked down on the little Tangle, as if all the stars in the sky were melted in them to make their brightness.

     "Ah! but," said Tangle, "when people live long they grow old.  At least I always thought so."

     "I have not time to grow old," said the lady.  "I am too busy for that.  It is very idle to grow old..." 

Hmmm, I'll have to remember that.

12 Days of Dec. ~ Day 4 #Zine Feature: Hearth & Heart by @RitaTortorello https://t.co/Nj4WSin1i8 #nature #stories pic.twitter.com/E1tLKorCcn

— Sweet Candy (@SweetCandyPress) December 5, 2015

eeeee!  I can't believe it.

Now, I really do wish I hadn't been too busy to get the next two editions out.  Weeeellll, better late than never.  I guess I'll just have to add two more things to my list of priorities.

THANKS SAGE! for featuring my zine.

Racing The Clock

I just made my to do list for tomorrow, and all I can say is--no wonder there is no time for writing.

The only thing that is going to make me feel better about it at this point is to post a picture I took today of Ruby and one of her chicks.

Ruby with chick

I often see a small face peeking out over the top of her wing.  Sometimes all I can see is a small beak.  They're getting big quickly.  And that means I'll have to make other arrangements to house them, soon.  

But no time to think about that this week.  This week I am in a book binding marathon, which includes 6 different titles.  I'm hoping to have time left over to work on a financial report due by Monday.  Give me strength!

It's all part of the seasonal deadline that comes when Christmas coincides with a book release.  No complaints.  And I should be caught up, and even a little ahead of the game soon.

I've already told Mike, I'm taking two weeks off from press related activities during the Christmas holiday.  Hoping to get some serious writing done then.  

Or even some rest.

Thanksgiving

Since we work out of our home, it's hard to take a day off.  Thanksgiving is no exception.  But rather than spend it in overwhelm, I chose to multitask under more pleasant conditions.

At noon, I decided to take my stack of books to be sewn in preparation for binding, outside and work in the sunshine so I could allow the cats outdoors to bask in the sun, while at the same time letting Ruby and her chicks out into the yard to scratch and forage.  Maintaining a human presence as a moderator between species made me feel more secure, although I'm sure Ruby could handle it on her own.  (The cats usually steer clear of her anyway).

The chicks are developing new skills on a daily basis.  Yesterday I noticed they were all taking short flights around the yard, and today, I saw one fly up to the porch.  They also began scratching for themselves today, rather than following Ruby around.  They also took their first dust bath today.

Now I'm indoors with a chicken in the oven (turkey is too big for just the two of us), and putting the final touches on a simple supper.

I'll be covering slip cases after supper and gluing spines, on the freshly sewn books.

I would have taken the day off, but with no company, and family too far away this year, I decided to take the opportunity to get more work done.  I'm racing the clock to get all the Christmas orders filled for Pegana Press customers.

I still feel disappointed over not getting my Autumn zine out.  It was so close to being finished.  It doesn't look like I'll have time to release the Winter edition either.

Potentials

Ruby with chicks (3 days old)

The chicks are just over a week old now.  Their wings have gone from fuzz to fully feathered and they are growing their tail feathers.  They even have their little micro combs along their foreheads.

Two rose buds broke off in the storm we had, right after I posted my last post.  Six rose buds.  Six chicks hatched out.  One didn't live, after hatching out.  Interesting how Nature reflects the world around us.

Ruby with chicks (1 week)

I feel really lucky to have the five.  They're hale and hearty, and growing fast.  Ruby is a dream mama hen.  She is a hybrid (sex link) and I got her from a local organic egg farm, along with 3 other pullets, nearly 18 months ago.  I really wasn't sure if her broody instincts would remain intact due to her lineage, or even if she'd be a good mom.  But she proved herself to be an ace on both counts.

My rooster is a barred rock.  Getting chicks from him, has increased his stock considerably with me.  Before this, I pretty much thought of him as that crazy rooster, that keeps attacking me when ever I go near the hen house.  More a pain in the butt than anything else.  But now, I see him in a whole new light.  And perhaps he senses my new found appreciation for him.  He seems gentler and less inclined to show me his spurs. (Or maybe he's just cold.)

A little over a week ago the potential for 10 hatchlings existed.  Move forward in time, and 5 chicks have joined us in our world.  Now the potential is whether they will grow up to be hens or roosters...or whether they will grow up at all.  I know what I'd like to happen.  I'd like to have 5 more healthy hens, who in turn may become mamas themselves.  But only time will tell.

Welcome to the flock, Peepers.  I'm so glad you're here.

Natural Childbirth at its Best

With the wind blowing in from the North, the warmest place to be is with mom.  I'm glad, she chose a place to nest, with a Southern exposure.

Ruby with two chicks

I guess it must be getting crowded under there.  I've seen 5 chicks so far, but the rosebush right outside their enclosure tells me there will be 8.

8 rosebuds on this bush in mid November

I'm so glad I trusted Ruby and let nature take its course.  Her chicks will be hale and hearty because they weren't made weak by human intervention.  The only help I've given Ruby is by way of food and water, and building her enclosure around her.  I'm so glad, I didn't go with an incubator.  There is so much beauty in "staying out of the way".

Hear that?  That's the sound of contentment radiating from a mama hen and her human friend.

And to answer the question why they don't squash the chicks by sitting on them.  She props herself up using her wings.  Nature so Rocks!

Ruby, my girl, you're a good mom.

Monday is a Fine Day Too

And it is day two too.  Day two of chick hatching.

This morning when I went out to feed Ruby, she showed me that she had 4 babies.

When I took a little break from work around 11:15, I could hear her very plainly asking me for greens, and since she wouldn't come out to forage, I brought her handfuls of tender dandelion greens and clover.  She ate ravenously, while chicks hopped all around my hands to see what this new thing might be.  She hasn't been outside the enclosure to forage for three or four days now.  And yet, despite her obvious need for green nourishment, I noticed how careful she was around the chicks.  She would be eating in a frenzy, but when a curious chick would come between her and the food, she would check herself, go slower and more gently, eating around her offspring.

And yes, at 11:30 the count was 5 live chicks.  And one that didn't make it and had been carefully place away from the nest.  From that evidence I can see that she occasionally gets off the nest to move around her enclosure.  Mostly to clean house apparently, because the weeds in that area are untouched.

By my count there should be 4 more eggs left to hatch, but I will be jolly thrilled with any chicks I get, especially if they turn out to be hens.

I'll try to get pictures soon.

Well now, back to work.

One Fine Sunday

It's flippin' cold outside.  So my friend Ruby Hen has decided to go broody.  Through shorter daylight hours, stormy nights and cold temperatures, she has been on the nest.  And this morning, because I knew it was getting close...I peeped at her when I was feeding her.  And I was rewarded with an answering peep from underneath her fluffed up feathers.

I kept my distance, and gave her plenty of space.  But I'm sure she could hear my heart singing.  I'm sure it carried for miles.

This afternoon, as I was taking out the compost, I caught sight of two black fluffy chicks exploring the world around their mom.  As soon as she saw me she tucked them in under her.  And still, I kept my distance and cooed to her and told her what fine chicks they were, and what a good mother she was.

I guess she knows, I won't take them from her, because every time I call to her now, she stands up to show me a glimpse of her chicks.  And at the end of the day, she stood up to show me there were 3.

Oh to be brand new in the world.

They are already exploring, and tasting things and pecking at things, and it's only their first day. And even though they're so small, they look so sturdy, and independent.  I found myself saying a prayer to the angels who watch over brand new baby animals, and their moms.  Let me watch them grow.  Let me watch this Joy in the form of downy feathers, and soft peeps, and dancing feet.

And when the most confident one spread it's tiny little wings, I remembered the words of Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes talking about chicks.  "Don't you know the angels breath through their wings?"

I do now.  I've seen it first hand.

Autumn Leaves

image Autumn Bridge found via google search on Jackee Holder .com

I just looked up from my busy life, to catch a glimpse of Autumn racing past on the wind.  I have done almost nothing this year to mingle with Time as it dons its seasonal garment of falling leaves, damp scents, misty mornings, warm sunny afternoons where the light falls upon the earth from a different point on the horizon, early evenings, and chilled air.

How is it possible to miss metabolizing this? Oh yes, I know what it is.  The illusion that I have a To Do list that will actually get done if I just keep at it. Just a distraction to keep me engaged with busy work. Keeping me busy Doing, rather than Being.

My birthright--my one great talent has always been for being present and Noticing.  Somehow, I have slipped into drowsiness, as I keep my nose to the grindstone, literally focusing on the dust particles of life.  The more I focus, the less I see.

Ducks in a row?  What is that nonsense?  Let them wander.  Let them fly.

Haute Couture

Zoë is recovering from a very large wound.  Today is the day the tummy wrap comes off  (actually it fell off yesterday, and I have been struggling to keep it on ever since).  The "cone of shame" they presented us with was obviously for a medium size dog, not for the diminutive Zoë.  Unless it goes around her waist.

In seeking solutions to keep her stapled tummy protected, it was suggested that I use a chihuahua tee-shirt.  I came up with this solution instead.

I am now painfully aware that my rags look better on Zoë than on me.  This is the sleeve of an old sweater.   I cut arm holes in it and folded the narrow end down to make a cowl.

I couldn't get very good pictures, but she looks very chic in person, and she seems to really love it.  What wouldn't be better than a blue elastic tummy wrap, miles too long.









#BetterDressedThanMommy

Hearth & Heart Autumn 2015 update

________________________
Hearth & Heart Autumn 2015
cover mock up

I was hoping to have this edition out by now, but things keep happening to delay.  I have almost the whole thing ready to go, but I needed to reproduce 4 major images and I'm not satisfied with the quality.  I guess I need to find another printer.

Zoë is another reason.  I have decided not to use that stupid over-sized cone on her, so that means that from time to time, I have to remind her not to start exploring her wound site, while it heals.  She's doing amazing.  I actually got some sleep last night.  I feel lucky that I work from home, because it allows me to be present with her.  One less thing to stress about.  And one thing I know from experience working in energy medicine with my own animals and with others, is that our human stress over our loved ones, slows down their healing process.  My analysis is that it causes an interference pattern in your psyche, which inhibits your ability to "see" your sick animal as healthy.  (Or to use the more familiar language of Abraham-Hicks, --You won't be a vibrational match with that outcome.)

I got some amazing insight into the physiology of a cat, while doing Zoë 's session last night.  It was so magical, that I might try and find a way to share it in story form.

I'm also doing some book binding work right now.  Pegana Press is releasing The Golden Key by George MacDonald with illustrations by Charles Van Sandwyk.  (hopefully by the end of September).  Visit the link to view photos of the book.

Well now it's off to work I go.

Tough Girl Hall of Fame

My life revolves around my family, home, and our businesses.  I think of myself as an average person, even though in reality, I'm probably not.  But the things that set me apart are simply a point of perspective about what to focus on.  The things that I share in common with most people in any culture, are the basics.  Love for Family, love for home, and working to support that.

Yesterday, I got to experience being at the veterinary clinic, something I would give almost anything to avoid.  But while there, I had the opportunity to observe the family dynamic that we as human beings create with our pets.  And here, I found another common connection that I share with most people.

Everyone in that building had a deep relationship with an animal as a family member.  I saw expressions of tenderness, empathy, joy, tears, guilt, relief on human faces.  And we connected with our eyes, and without speaking a word recognized each other as members of the same tribe.  We had all opened our hearts and our homes to embrace an animal as family.

My cat friend Zoë, was the reason for the visit.  I have done everything possible to create a safe outdoor environment for them, by building a high fence, that keeps them in and mostly keeps other animals out.  But it seems that she had been attacked by something, and had a large gash in her very small body across her abdominal area.  It went undetected for about 3 1/2 days, because the wound had folded in on itself, and there wasn't even any blood.  So even though I heard her scream in her angry girl fighting voice, I've heard her use it to warn off other cats passing by, outside of the fence, and so I put it down to the neighbor cat getting too close to her turf.  Especially, since I could find nothing obviously wrong with her.  She was angry and upset, and continued to curse at everyone.  I guess I should have known.

She spent the day hunkered down and didn't eat.  I still couldn't find anything wrong with her.  But I gave her some energy medicine, and she seemed to be fine the next day.  Appetite was back and she was moving around again.

Over the next 2 days she got better and better.  She seemed like herself in every way except that she was careful with her movements.  But I continued to be worried.  We talked about taking her to the vet, but our experience with that has mostly been, expensive tests that show nothing, and then the vet says they can find nothing wrong, and the animal gets well on their own.  On Friday night, I was doing a BodyTalk session on her and found lumps on her stomach.  The shape of it reminded me of intestines and my fear was a hernia.  I wouldn't even let my mind dwell on the possibility of tumors.  I just knew I needed to get her to the vet.

The next day husband and I drove Zoë into town for her appointment.  I watched with horror as the vet's assistant pried open the folds of skin to reveal a wound that most likely would have been slow poison to my small friend.  So much of the tissue had already died.  My poor dear girl.

And through all of that handling, she didn't utter a sound.  And she held as still as possible.  Which has definitely won her a spot in the tough girl hall of fame.

They did surgery to repair the wound and I was able to keep the promise I had made to her, before we set out, that no matter what, I would bring her home that same day.

She's sleeping next to me right now as I write.  Somehow, I've made her understand that it's not a good idea to try and get at the wound while it heals.  I've used words and sent her pictures in my mind to help her understand.  And as added incentive, she knows about The Cone.  The dread 'cone of shame'.  She's worn one before, and I sent her pictures and stimulated her memory about how it felt.  Never the less, I will be spending the next few days watching her.  Which will allow me a good excuse to plant myself in one spot and write.

Hearth & Heart Autumn Edition

I'm just about ready to release Hearth & Heart Volume 1 2015 Autumn Edition.  This quarterly zine is filled with short stories, and images, as well as some surprises.

The Autumn Edition 2015 features 3 short stories, an essay, and a poem.  Story titles include  A Fairy Tale from 1969, Smile!, and There Be Giants.

Genre: Magical Realism

This zine will be available at Pegana Press Books  as well as at my Etsy shop  A Charmed Enchantment in about a week.  Only about 3 weeks later than I had hoped to release it, but considering my relationship with Time, I did pretty well.

Learning To Push The Easy Button

I have long realized that I seem to do everything the hard way.  But recently I became determined to install an Easy Button on my life.

Where does one get an easy button?  All you gotta do is ask.  Which I did.  I asked the powers that be, and now I am noticing a difference.

I am actually making choices right now that save me time and effort.  Choices which are allowing me to be productive.  And I'm learning to ask for help.

There's a difference between asking for help that you really need, and being pressured to accept help that you don't need and I'm learning to distinguish that difference.

There is a specific energy that goes with having an Easy Button.  It is different from the overwhelm, I have been used to experiencing these last two years or so.  It feels like ease and grace.  It feels like tranquility.

I have to say, I'm really enjoying it.  I just hope it comes with a life time warranty.  

Of Spoons

I finally sold my first zine on etsy.  It's the only venue that wasn't working for me, and now I'm really glad I sold one at this time in particular, because I ended up finding, through etsy, a very important article that I would like to share here.

I had decided that I would close my etsy account after my listings expired, but when I came back from helping my parents move, I found that I had actually sold something.  So after figuring out where the payment had gone, (because I had apparently set that up wrong) I decided to relist Hearth & Heart, as well as the letterpress holiday cards we make at Pegana Press.

work in progress "dummy" zine

I don't spend much time on etsy, because I don't have all that much spare time to familiarize myself with something new.  But I happened to notice that two people had "favorited" my zine, and I wanted to understand that aspect of etsy a little better so I clicked on the name.  Such a random thing for me to do, but it led me eventually to a very inspiring article, because I happened to notice there was "team" on etsy going by the name of "Calling All Spoonies".

I became interested because I am almost finished creating a zine about spoons, and I could tell this wasn't the same thing at all.

When I followed the link it took me to a site called "But You Don't Look Sick . com"  And I found this article explaining The Spoon Theory and was immediately touched by it.

http://www.butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory/ 

If you have a chronic illness, you will relate.  If you know someone with a chronic illness, it will help you to think about that person in a whole new light.

Thanks to Christine Miserandino for this eloquent work.  It has touched me tremendously.

Catching Up

Busy Summer!  I've been helping my folks move.

I've been saying good bye to the woods on my parent's old place.  I will miss the land they've lived on these past dozen years or so.  Tomorrow the place will go to the new owners.  Only one more trip back for me to gather up three plants my mom wanted to keep and couldn't fit into the trailer.  I feel like I won't be able to rest until I get them safely tucked into their temporary sanctuary at my home.

Nor will I feel truly rested until I know that my parents won't need to make any more trips back and forth moving things.  Some things are being temporarily stored at my home to be moved at a more convenient time.

I know...

It's usually the kids who store their things with their parents.

I was sad yesterday as I meandered through the woodland trails, saying good bye to everything.  I know this new family - with young children - will embrace the land, as my family has.  And it, in turn will welcome them.  Those woods are a wonderland.

But the new home my parents have, is also a wonderland, and I find myself wanting to live there too.  They have traded old cedars for young pine, and misty rain for sun and wind.  The new place is also magical.  It makes me happy for them.  And they are still close enough for me to make a day trip or stay the week end.

Good byes are hard.  Leaving old friends for new...  Trading the familiar for the new adventure...

Hee Hee Hee

Isn't Google Cute?

I'm sorry, but that just tickles me.  It doesn't take much to make me happy.

I'm still too sick to get out of bed, but what a kick that I sold 3 zines today.  Thank you to Andrew (in the UK), Andrew (in the US), and Karla (US) who each bought copies of Hearth & Heart.

My husband Mike has been taking good care of me.  I don't know what will happen if he comes down with whatever fresh hell this is.

And thanks to my friend Lyn, who does BodyTalk, and who probably saved my sanity, when this illness grew horns and fangs today.  (You think I'm kidding??)

It's been a good birthday.  Visited by loved ones, and calls.  Emails and texts from friends.  Birthday party last Saturday for R & R (Rebbeckah & Rita).

And heck, even Google cares (sniff).

Hearth & Heart is available on Pegana Press or if you prefer, Etsy

Happy Birthday to me & Kim, and Rebbeckah, and Paula.  I know all kinds of Geminis.

Adventures in Etsy

Hi...just a quick update to say, I now have an Etsy shop and you can find it here at ACharmedEnchantment  The other place you can buy my work is at Pegana Press Zines or Pegana Press Winter Tales

In other news, I am wiped out with some kind of respiratory thing right now.  So I've been spending the last couple of days in bed.

Just spent the last hour writing my "about shop" page on Etsy only to find out it hadn't saved any of it.  These things happen, but I just don't have the energy to rewrite it all now.  So it's back to sleep.

More later.  ♥

Zine-ing

As a self published author, I thought zines would be a good way to get my short stories out more quickly than writing a full length book.  Plus it adds a whole new layer of creativity to the project.  Plus it's fun.

But there is a dark side to this zine making.  Yes.

I am learning about myself while engaged in this work.  When I told my friend Sage I wanted to try my hand making a zine, she responded by saying that I had the hard part out of the way, because I already had written the stories.

Uh, no actually.  For me, the stories are the easy part.  Stories just sort of tell themselves to me.  It's more like they just happen to me.

The cutting and pasting, now that's hard.  Not kidding-really.  The whole multi media art form thing was very daunting to me.  But I'm getting the hang of it.  And it's very freeing.

I was programmed from an early age, not to deface books.  Not to cut them, or mark them up.  To handle them with care.  My text books in university were only barely touched with a highlighter, if at all.  (Do they still have text books at universities?)

And being a book binder by trade, I am in the business of making books.  So it's very difficult for me to take a pair of scissors even to a magazine.

And collage is all about the layers, right?  But one of my other vocations is that I'm an energy worker/healer type, and in that activity it's all about removing the layers.  So I was baffled by the whole process of collage at first.

When I was a kid I used to write stories and draw all the time.  I got so that I could do very detailed pencil sketches with high lights and shading.  But as I grew into a busy adult, the creative me began shrinking.  And things like writing and artwork began to freak me out.  The less I engaged in those practices the more important they seemed to be, and the less capable I felt myself to be.  By the time I was in my late 20s, I was so wound up with anxiety around artwork, that to do a pencil sketch would take me hours, and then I would leave it unfinished.

That set a precedence, which led to a long string of unfinished stories too.  Then I stopped singing and playing music too.  That whole "not good enough" fear factor just spiraled out into every aspect of my creative life.

Now, many years later, I have reconnected with my creative muse.  I am writing and drawing and singing again, only now my drawings are more like cartoons, and doodles and I'm okay with that, because now they are fun and spontaneous and I actually finish them.

I would much rather have a finished creative scribble, than an unfinished master piece.  And this is why.  Because all of the feeling you're trying to convey in that scribble is actually recorded on the paper.  It is in every way like a vinyl record.  So I know that what I'm trying to demonstrate with a sketch or a doodle is going to communicate itself, even if it's not fine art--and that's what I'm after.

Which brings me back around to collage and zine making.  It's a great process for shining some light into the dusty corners of one's psyche.  And it's a very primal way of expressing creativity which takes me right back to being a kid.

Hey, it's my first zine!  I'm gonna put it on my refrigerator, like the rest of the kid art.

Hearth & Heart is available at Pegana Press.  https://www.peganapress.com/zines.html

Tiny

Love You Always

1920-2015

Zine Complete

I'm excited to announce that Hearth & Heart is finally complete and on sale now.

You may find it on the Pegana Press website by following the link below.

Hearth & Heart

Hearth & Heart vol. 1 2015 Summer Edition

Hearth & Heart

I am very fortunate to know Sage Adderley of Sweet Candy Distro.  I met her a couple of years ago and to my delight, we have become friends.

Until I met Sage, I had never heard of zines.  But her passion for them is contagious and now I have embarked on creating my first zine.

Hearth & Heart is a quarterly zine which features short stories (of magical realism?).  What is Magical Realism? I just call it life.  I can't help it if it reads like fiction.  --I hope to have copies ready to sell before the week is out.

I have been taking a squint at my blog, (I had to blow the dust off it first) and I realized I hadn't been posting much since Penny died.   Just life happening.  It was Sage who reminded me not to neglect my blog.

So here's an update about the hens.  When the hawk took my Penny, I was determined that would not happen again.  My friends down the road who have chickens gave me a rooster, and he is turning out to be a good protector.  In fact at times he engages in protecting the flock from me, which is always an adrenaline rush.  It's really my boots that he hates apparently.  So we have to work around that.

Chicken drama!  Who knew?

Here's 3/4 of my flock.  Rocky (the barred rock rooster) is in the foreground.  I'm wondering if he will ever stop growing.  He's about twice as big as the girls now.  I fully expect to wind up with a six foot rooster.  Barredzilla!

Working on the zine now.  Will post update when it becomes available.

Winter Tales/Customer Reviews

Winter Tales contains three original short stories.  I wrote the material for a fine press limited edition chapbook, released by Pegana Press.  Here are some quotes from emails I received.

On Voice of Fire:

I Love the concept of music being held within the memory of the tree. Thank you so much for the beautiful book! I will treasure it for years to come. Please keep writing! You are  damn good at it!!

On Where the Snow Folk Live:

I've read and re read "Where The Snow Folk Live."

I feel like I have one of those huge and heavy fairytale books from my childhood. The book with stories that mesmerize. Tales for special occasions only. Reading your story Is like uncovering  a mystical passage and discovering a book that was hidden in order to preserve its secrets. 

And that is what great storytelling does!!!  Bravo

The  characters (in addition to the letters) really add to that story and the look of the page . They Create visual interest for me.

Thanks

On Cup of Cheer:

"Cup of Cheer" is my favorite of the three stories. For me it's like Jack and the Beanstalk and the Snow Queen went on a road trip and met the Star Trek crew. I love the idea of the "mixture of cultural anomalies." 

Winter Tales available from Pegana Press

Embroidering the Fabric of Reality

Have I lost touch with reality?

Oh, most assuredly I have!

It blinks in and out, changes shapes and colors, sights, sounds and smells.

It spins out of control and knocks me off my feet at times.

Actually it isn't possible to lose touch with reality entirely.  We are it and we are in it.  It is only possible to lose touch with someone else's translation of reality.  But we always have a firm footing in our version of what that is, even if it changes from one moment to the next.

So said the writer of today's current version of my reality.

Have I lost touch with reality?

Why do you ask?  Haven't you ever?

Spring!!!!!!!

It is the season of newness and it is the season of crazy, fast growth.  I love all the seasons, and for me Lady Spring is the season of Potential.

Potential to begin something new and different.  Potential to tap into the creative energy of Spring.  It is a stunning morning.  I see the sun is rising through the trees to the east, and the air is still, after the storm.

Yesterday with waning moon in Capricorn, I was determined to plant potatoes.  It's March! Time is fleeting.  The ground has been ready for days, and the potatoes were cut into seed pieces with their little eyes growing like mad, shouting "Plant us!"

But yesterday it was also raining and blustery, and I waited for hours, doing other things, hoping for the sky to clear and the rain to stop and then towards late afternoon, I realized I needed to make a choice.

I decided to go out in the rain and plant potatoes.  I was dressed warmly, and as I was putting my boots on, I remembered other times in my life when I needed the weather to accommodate me, and it did.  So I just decided to ask.

I asked that the storm would subside while I planted potatoes.  I stepped outside and the rain slowed to a light drizzle, and by the time I had my garden fork and trowel in hand, the rain stopped entirely.  There was an actual break in the clouds and the sky brightened as the sun shone through.

I could see a wall of big dark clouds in the distant horizon, and they were coming fast, so I worked fast too.  I tucked the little seed potatoes into their well prepped beds and finished just as the clouds rolled in overhead, hiding the sun.  I straightened up and heard the wind roaring and saw the trees windmilling their branches.  And I laughed.  Their was so much joy in the wildness of the storm all around me, and so much beauty in the synchronous timing of the weather during planting.

I put my tools away, and walked around my place, enjoying the wind in motion and picking up things blown in by the storm.  I took a moment to reinforce the fence in the hen yard, before heading back inside.  I was taking my boots off on the back porch when I looked up to see the rain had started up again.  I laughed once more, and sent out a wave of joyous gratitude to nature and the creative consciousness.  My way of throwing my arms wide to embrace the All.

Life Goes On

My family is contriving to keep me awake.

I stayed up too late last night working.

After I finally slipped into slumber, my husband woke up.  He decided to work in the middle of the night, which usually doesn't wake me, but for some reason I heard every move he made while I was trying to sleep.

Then the crazy cats who used to sleep the night through with their humans, but are now confused decided that if one human is up, the other should be too.

One scratched at the door to get out, one scratched at the door to get in.  After getting up a half dozen times in a stupor, I finally gave up and left the door open.  Then one stood on my head (the heaviest one, I might add) and one tried to eat my blankets.

Finally I gave up.  I could see the sky was getting light and needed to let the hens out.  I wondered why my husband was being so quiet.  I found him blissfully asleep.

I got dressed and fed the cats.  I vowed I would keep waking them throughout the day.  Then I went to let the hens out into their yard.

We had finally established a routine, after the big upset last week, when my favorite hen was taken by a hawk.  But the trickster was having fun with me, and the easy task of getting my hens into their new better protected yard, turned into a chicken rodeo.  I came into the house, panting and wheezing.

It's no good going back to sleep.  I have a ton of work to do today.  So all I can do is sit here for a few moments with a cup of hot coffee (usually it's tepid, by the time I get around to it) and look at the magnificent sun rising through the trees, casting long shadows and chasing the mist away.  Watch the dew sparkle on the grass.  And dream of Tuesday, the nearest thing I have to a day off.

I can hear the birds singing.  Why shouldn't they sing?  It's a beautiful day and they got a full night of sleep.

I've decided I will run away from home.  Into my back yard.  I have dreams of building a tiny cottage out of pallets and then retreating there for a full night of rest every evening.  I wonder if I'll see them through.

Excuse me while I go wake the cats...

Inconsolable

Penny

Of Ice and Mountain Slopes

"And in my dreams, I travel with them to realms inseparable from the stars."
--Where the Snow Folk Live

Where the Snow Folk Live is one of three short stories found in Winter Tales available from Pegana Press Books.

Where the Snow Folk Live from Winter Tales available at Pegana Press

Catching Up with Life

I have got the Spring Cleaning Bug, big time.  The weather is warming up, there is a freshness in the air, I see honey bees on blossoms, and the birds have stopped raiding the chicken feed.  And though we haven't even reached February yet, I have felt the call to action, and am charging around the house, dust cloth and broom in hand.

Furniture is being moved, whole rooms, in fact...

Here's a photo from a more tranquil time.  ;^)

March 2009 in the Maritime NW

Random Thoughts - Plastic & Fruit

Single use plastic:  Why would you use a non biodegradable material as disposable packaging?

VS. 

An apple comes with it's own delicious edible packaging courtesy of nature.  

Wheel Spinning

I'm an expert.  I can manifest more ways to spin my wheels...

Oh sure, it looks like real business, and anyone will tell you that life happens.  But really???

Every morning dawns bright with pure potential.  16 hours with which to make things happen.  Then "Fate?" intervenes.

This morning as I began a very involved project, I heard my hens literally shrieking for help.  I know their voices.  I know the clucks and cackles that mean "Hey! All the nesting boxes are full!" and the angry squawks that result from being pecked, and all the other sounds that used to bring me running.  But today, I heard a bonafide SOS distress call.  And I dropped everything, and practically tore the door off the hinges.  I may even have plowed through a fence.

Good thing too.  I startled a hawk and he flew into the fence twice, before finally navigating his way out of the yard.  And I saw before my eyes a landscape completely bare of hens.  Where in the world were my girls?

So I ran down to where I saw the hawk lift off from, and saw hen feathers all around.  With a sense of dread, I started calling and hunting along the fence line, and way back in a corner of the fence, where the black berry brambles have grown to cover an old broken chair, I saw four little feathered bums all crammed into a space that seemed impossibly small to harbor four fully grown hens.

I coaxed them out with my usual "chick chick chick", and they gingerly stepped out of the briars.  I looked each one over, and they all clustered around me as we paraded in triumph back to the hen house.  And I praised them for their quick thinking and ability to protect themselves from predators while I fed them a little extra feed, because who wouldn't want to have a little something after cheating death.

Then I began building little shelters all over their yard.  Which of course took time away from the other project that I had abandoned for the defense of my flock.  I finally stopped at six hiding places.  It was a beautiful day and they had a ball investigating all of the new play houses in their yard.

But when I came inside and looked at the clock it was 12:30.  And so it goes.  Yes, I got on with the project I was supposed to be working on, which also took longer than I intended...

But that's another story.

Winter Tales Ships Today

Winter Tales by Rita Tortorello available through Pegana Press

Winter Tales is complete and shipping out to new homes world wide.  I'm excited to see this book finally going into the hands of readers.

Limited to 50 copies, hand set and letter press printed by Mike Tortorello at Pegana Press in blue ink on snow white paper.  This book is bound as a chapbook and sold through Pegana Press Books.

It is my first published work, and I am proud to join the community of self published authors who are creating a new way to present their written words to the world.  I'm excited to be living in a time when we have the option to change how authors, artists, and musicians are received, making it possible for them to find their tribe of people who appreciate what they create.

I am the author of Winter Tales, which consists of three short stories inspired by Winter and the elements of Fire and Ice.  As the other half of Pegana Press, I also had a hand in the making of the physical book.  I do the binding at Pegana Press, and this book, because we wanted to keep it simple, is bound as a chapbook using a combination of blue flax linen and glacier blue silk threads to sew the cover of French Canson paper of soft gray, reminiscent of late afternoon shadows on snow with ornate cover title in blue ink and a glimpse of sparkle.

The three short stories contained within can best be described as magical realism.  Which is really just the ability to notice and interact with the magic which takes place in everyday life.  The Voice of Fire was inspired by listening to the Fire.  Try it and you'll see what I mean.  Where the Snow Folk Live was inspired by the land which is home to the Yeti.  And Cup of Cheer is the most magical of all.  Life on Earth from the perspective of that which fires the sky-the Northern Lights.  As I said earlier, all inspired by Fire and Ice.  The mystic spirit of Winter.

Stories like these exist to remind us that life is filled in every moment with magic which hides itself in ordinary things, but seeks to gain our attention so that we may awaken from the repetitive hypnotic trance of modern life and see through a different lens.

Stories tell themselves all the time--to all of us.  Sometimes, we hear.

Winter Tales

Put On A Happy Face

Sometimes the only thing left to do is put on your smiley face.

Cup of Cheer

Cup of Cheer is one of the short stories from Winter Tales.  The setting for this story is an inn on the frontier that borders "the land to the West and the land to the East".  Not only is the frontier a threshold between worlds, as all borders are, but it is the departure point for the narrator of the story.

A page from Cup of Cheer which appears in Winter Tales from Pegana Press

This is the final week end to get Winter Tales at the special preorder price.  This letterpress chapbook is limited to 50 copies and will be released on Monday January 19, 2015.  You may order your copy at Pegana Press Books.

Listen to excerpts read from Winter Tales in this discussion.

Some Random Thoughts

Last night near sunset, I felt the temperature drop like a stone in a pond.  I hustled the hens onto their roost so I could close them in safely for the night, but I could tell they weren't yet ready to be finished with their day.  After all there was still light in the sky.  A lot of scratching and pecking could be done with that last 10 or 15 minutes before nightfall.

But I was cold, and couldn't wait to be indoors.  I could hear them grumbling as I walked back to the house.

I was cutting some Himalayan lakta end papers for the books I will be binding in the next couple of days and I cranked the heat in the room I was working in.  Later when I went outside at around 7 o'clock, I stopped to admire the stars in the clear night sky overhead.  No wonder my hands were still ice cold.

This morning I woke to a world of frost.  And when I went out to the hen house just before sunrise and opened the door, Penny (always the last hen in at night and the first one out in the morning) flew out and gave me a sharp peck in the leg.  I guess hens have long memories.

I found the above photo on a Google search.  It was sent in by reader Chris Smart to The Telegraph in the UK.  I was struck by how closely it resembles my own ground (here in the Puget Sound) just outside my front door.  Frost covered oak and maple leaves.  Brrr.

I had to use this photo because when I went out to take my own, the frost had melted off.  Somehow it hasn't made me feel any warmer.  I think I'll go warm up by washing the breakfast dishes.  Warm soapy water aught to do the trick.

Stay warm.

Where the Snow Folk Live

From the letterpress chapbook, Winter Tales available from Pegana Press

Where the Snow folk Live.  They are as elusive as a dream.  They strike fear in the hearts of most.  A tale inspired by the search for the Yeti.  Winter Tales

Hens in the Yard

What makes me feel rich?  When I look out into my back garden and see my four hens, I feel very rich.

Even in the dead of winter, my girls never let me down.  They provide us with 3 to 4 eggs a day.  Everyday!  I feed them organic chicken feed, and kitchen scraps, but they mostly forage.  And that is another reason having hens makes me feel rich.

I look outside and see four little gardeners all working the soil and composting and generally just creating really fertile soil out of my very dry silty soil that was once, only hospitable to quackgrass.

But now I have hens.  They cleaned up a piece of ground in two days that would have taken me well over a week of painful back breaking labor.  And as far as I could tell, they applied very little effort and seemed to enjoy it immensely.

They bring an energy of industrious joy to the land.  They love being busy.  They love to see me coming.  They love to follow me around.  And in the spring, when it's time to plant, I will move them to another spot, and let them work their magic on a new piece of ground.

They are my new partners in permaculture.  And I am very grateful to them.

My flock:  Penny, Tricksy, Fanny and Ruby

The Voice of Fire

Do you ever sit in front of a fire, and listen to the song it sings?  Have you ever hearkened to The Voice of Fire?  A story of magical realism by Rita Tortorello.  One of three short stories in Winter Tales available through Pegana Press.

The Voice of Fire from Winter Tales available through Pegana Press.

Here is a page from the letterpress chapbook, Winter Tales.  Special preorder price is available through January 18, 2015 at Pegana Press.


You can listen here to an excerpt read by the author.

Winter Tales StoryCast

In this StoryCast we discuss the inspirations behind Winter Tales.  The author (OK, that's me) reads an excerpt from two of the stories.

Enjoy.

Winter Tales

Winter Tales -  Three original stories available from Pegana Press.

I'm really excited to announce the upcoming release of my first published works.  Three short stories of fantasy inspired by the winter season, collected together in a hand letterpress chapbook under the title Winter Tales.  Available through Pegana Press.

A Little Background

Winter Tales was first conceived by my husband Mike who wanted to have a special chapbook to release for the winter season.  Together we run Pegana Press.  He is the letterpress printer who lovingly and painstakingly sets each individual letter and space of type for each book created, and then takes each block of type apart to use those letters and spaces in creating the next page.  It takes months for him to create a book.  Once the book is finished, he hands it to me for binding, which I do by hand.  For almost 6 years we have worked to create the kinds of books we ourselves would enjoy reading, with works from some of our favorite authors.

Since we typically publish works by authors known to collectors of fantasy, Winter Tales is a bit of a departure for us.

The Stories

Stories tell themselves to me constantly, right out of ordinary day to day experiences.  And if I'm present and focused, I am able to recognize it as such.  My brain says, 'Hey! That's a story.' and then I will  rush to my computer and write it down.  And because I see ordinary daily occurrences as magical, the stories typically feel like fantasy.  I am told that this style of writing is referred to as magical realism.  I like that phrase.  I joyfully inhabit that realm of magical realism in my perception.

An example of that is conveyed in the first story of Winter Tales, entitle The Voice of Fire.  That story was inspired by simply sitting by the fire and listening to the sounds it makes.

The second story, Where the Snow Folk Live was inspired by the legend of the Yeti.  And the third story, Cup of Cheer was inspired by a photograph I saw years ago.  I used it in a blog post, but when it came time to write the story, the only thing that I kept was the title.  The story had by now, evolved into an idea inspired by the Northern Lights.

In the next day or two, I will include some excerpts read from Winter Tales.  I hope you will enjoy.

Transition

Garden of Awakening Orchids in Portland OR.

If you've landed here expecting to see HeartStar MindBody Connection, I've moved it.  It was a relatively painless process, and for that I am grateful.  I've installed a tab at the top of the page labeled "Energy Medicine" that will take you to its new location immediately.

I wear a lot of hats these days.  I am still very much involved in my Energy Medicine practice, and seeing clients regularly.  And I love doing that work very much.

I am still binding books for Pegana Press, which is our small family run press.  And I love doing that very much too.

I think talents and interests are like children.  They are each unique and they each require special care and nurturing to bring out the best in them.  And like children they can be loved equally, even though each one adds something different to our lives.

I have been writing for many many years and in all this time, I have kept my writing mostly to myself.  I haven't even thought about publishing until recently.  I have always just enjoyed writing and when a story came to me, I wrote it down.

Now suddenly, I find that my status has changed.  I am publishing three short stories in a chapbook format through Pegana Press.  The book is limited to 50 copies.  It was hand set and letterpress printed on a Vandercook SP15 press, and will be hand sewn with ornate soft cover.  It will most likely be ready for release next week.  There is also a tab on the menu bar above, which links to Pegana Press labeled Winter Tales, which is the name of the book. *

Winter Tales contains three original short stories inspired by the elements of Fire and Ice.  I will be talking more about the stories in my next post.

Thank you for your interest.

* See my Written Works tab for links to publications.